Reacting Vs Responding: Cultivating Mindful Engagement
Have you ever found yourself reacting in the heat of the moment, only to regret it later? We've all been there and unfortunately it rarely has a good end result.
But what if we could shift from reactive autopilot to mindful response? Let's explore the difference.
What is a Reaction?
A reaction is like a reflex—it's quick, automatic, and driven by emotion. It's our body's way of responding to stimuli without much thought. While reactions serve a purpose in certain situations (like taking your hand off a hot pan), they can sometimes lead to unintended consequences.
What is a Response?
On the other hand, a response lies somewhere between our conscious and unconscious minds. It's preceded by reflection and consideration of the situation at hand. Responses are grounded in mindfulness, empathy, and self-awareness.
Introducing the P.L.A.C.E. Skill:
So how can we cultivate mindful responses in our daily lives? This is where the P.L.A.C.E. skill comes in handy. It’s a simple, yet powerful, tool to guide us in navigating the space between reaction and response.
Let’s go through them one by one:
(P) Pause: Take a moment to step back and breathe. Allow yourself the space to assess the situation calmly.
(L) Label the emotion: Acknowledge what you're feeling without judgment. Are you angry, frustrated, or maybe anxious? Naming the emotion helps us understand ourselves better.
(A) Ask why: Dive deeper into the root cause of your emotions. Understanding why we feel a certain way fosters self-awareness and compassion. So if you are angry, think about why you are actually angry.
(C) Choose a mindful response: Consider your options carefully. What response aligns with your values and the well-being of others? Opt for kindness and empathy whenever possible. We both know that an angry response is not going to give us a great result, whatever the situation.
(E) Empower yourself: Commit to practicing mindfulness in every situation. Remember, you have the power to choose how you respond to life's challenges.
Reacting vs Responding - A Simple Example:
Let's take a common scenario—a child accidentally breaks something valuable in the house while playing.
Reaction: if you quickly react with anger or harsh words it may frighten the child and cause emotional harm.
Response: You more calmly explain the situation and the consequences of their actions. This fosters more understanding from the child and encourages growth and learning.
By embracing the P.L.A.C.E. skill, we can cultivate a more compassionate and intentional way of engaging with the world around us.
So let's pause, breathe, and choose mindful responses that nourish our souls and those around us.